Saturday, July 05, 2014
Lucky Bastards
A week ago a friend
took me on his boat for a ride through the Wachau region of Austria: I am of
course very partial to my home country, so my judgement is probably skewed. But
the experience of a sunny day, beautiful landscape and good company was enough
to make me think what a lucky bastard I was, being able to experience such a
day. Even if you have never been privileged to see the prettiest winegrowing
region of Austria, you surely have had similar experiences: the famous mountain
peak, a remarkable painting, or the birthday of a friend which reminds you how
lucky you are to know this person. All of us do, at times, find life one big
gift: when beauty, happiness, joy, whatever, hit us, and for no good reason
other than grace, all of us thank our “lucky stars” for such experience.
At least, that is the
theory, that when we are grateful, we say “thank you”. But the opposite is
true: while we are quick to complain, we are slow so express gratitude. When service on an airline is poor, we
complain; when the bus is late, we complain; when a street is dirty, we
complain; when Germany loose in the World Cup, we complain. But when is the
last time we thanked a stewardess for being so competent; when did we greet the
bus driver with a “thanks for being on time!” or the street sweeper for doing
his daily job; or when did we write a fan letter to the German soccer team?
Somehow we feel a sense of entitlement, so that good things are supposed to
happen to us, but not bad ones. Hence the popular title of a book a few years
ago “Why do bad things happen to good people?”, implying that most of us are
good, and we do not deserve bad things.
This attitude in life also extends to dealing with top
management, i.e. God himself: when it rains, we are fed-up, but when the sun
shines we do not give thanks. When life sucks, we are grouchy; but when things
go well, we take it for granted; a raise is what we deserve, a pay cut is an
injustice. There are even scientific concepts explaining this phenomenon, such
as attribution theory: it shows that when people are successful, they explain
that through their own merits; when they fail, they are more likely to blame
external causes for it.
My work regularly takes me to Africa, including some of the
poorest parts, such as Uganda. The first thing you notice when you arrive there
are the smiley faces, almost making you think that people were happy, even in
abject poverty. And when you spend any
time with them, you hear some of the most remarkable statements, such as “I am
so grateful I made it through the night” or “Isn’t it wonderful to be alive”.
The lack of things which we consider bare necessities seems to have made them
not grouchy, but grateful and able express it.
