Sunday, December 04, 2011

 

Let’s keep it up in the air!


Not to be weighed down, encumbered, but travelling light; that is an ideal that some of us aspire to, not only when it comes to having carry-on luggage only, but also in terms of attachments. Commitments, obligations, things or people we have to take care of- all these slow us down, add weight to our backpack and make us less flexible. The options should always remain maximally open, making moving on virtually painless. What I here describe is Ryan Bingham’s philosophy: he is a high-flying executive and actually cherishes being on the road a lot. Wandering the United States, totally self-sufficient and free of commitments, seems a good deal; so much so, that he even gives seminar on the topic, encouraging people to empty their backpack and rid themselves of ballast, including cumbersome relationships.

Alex, his female counterpart, while not quite clocking as many miles as him, is wired similarly. So no surprise that their one-night stand develops into a long-distance relationship, and every so often they meet in some hotel room and make love. When Ryan needs to attend his sister’s wedding, he convinces Alex to come along, and they spend a weekend in the middle of nowhere, in Northern Wisconsin. The wedding is super cheesy and worlds removed from Alex and Ryan’s lifestyle, but somehow more real: messy, not shiny, incomplete, yet human.

Ryan is not the same after that weekend and has to break off a lecture on his backpack philosophy; he gets on a plane to find Alex instead. So far just another romantic chick-flick. But there is a twist in the story which I will refrain from telling you, lest I spoil the plot. But what becomes clear is that suddenly going back to a full back-pack is not as easy as it seems. People have moved on, and what looked so attractive and free is actually very lonely.

To change metaphors, making a sculpture means taking away, getting rid of rock in order for the masterpiece to appear. If I refuse to take the chisel to the block I will always have lots of material, but no shape. Similarly our lives take shape as we sacrifice degrees of freedom, as we nail ourselves down rather than to keep everything up in the air. During the season of Advent I do not travel, because my housemates and I have decided to all be home during that time. How often have I chafed against this decision; yet I love it when I come home in December and we are all there. The fruit of that decision far outweighs the cost!

So next time you want to take something out of your backpack, ask yourself whether some ballast would not do you good and add shape to your life.


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